There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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