you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
