so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
