Who wears a wallet chain?!
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize