People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
