She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize