check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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