well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
