Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
