Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
