that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
