awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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