Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
