I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
