absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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