...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
