Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize