Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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