The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
