I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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