ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
