Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
