Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
