We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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