Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
she looked like the before picture.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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