What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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