on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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