I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
