I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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