I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
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