we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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