About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
This is classic penis vs brain.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
