hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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