Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Randomize
