I think scott just propositioned me for sex
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
