marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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