Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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