I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
