i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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