Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Help. Why am I so naked?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
