i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
