Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I would ride that face into the sunset
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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