One girl and one boy is just not enough.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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