Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize