Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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