my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize