when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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