Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
