I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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