This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
