My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize